Why Playstation All-Stars Battle Royale Has Me Cold

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I love Playstation. I wouldn’t go as far as saying I’m blinded by all things Sony but I adore their franchises, characters and multiverse. So, you would expect that the new Playstation All Stars Battle-Royale would have me weeping Sony tainted tears of joy? Well no. Me and my cynical brain have crushed my anticipation and excitement for this character brawl-fest into a piled mush of lament and disappointment. I hate my brain sometimes. Stupid brain.

When it was announced that I could pit Kratos and the-most-gorgeous-and-amazing-man-ever Nathan Drake in a battle of slashing, shooting and stabbing, I was ecstatic! ‘Imagine this!’ I screamed from my bedroom whilst dodging the neighbours bricks ‘I can make Sackboy punch a flaming clown in the gooloolies!’. And then the trailers came.

It looked good…….cute, adorable and fun looking. Not incredible, but good. Yet, as any credible gaming writer would, I decided to reserve judgment until I played the so called Super Smash Bro’s clone. I watched the videos, read the previews and stared at the screenshots but I could feel my excitement dwindling.

It seemed my favourite characters were out of place. Sackboy doesn’t fight, he just stands there and makes my heart fuzzy. Kratos doesn’t fight, he would just rip everyone’s heads off and then bath in their blood whilst molesting their souls. My friends from years of Sony gaming seemed to be have been spliced together in this multi-character fighter.

It felt like your sad school years when your parents forced you to be friends with someone, smacking your heads together to try and scrape away at something you had in common just so they could hang out with the other parents because they had the box set of Mad Men. At least, I think that’s what my parents did. That’s right; Playstation All Stars had become my traumatic lonely childhood.

Anyway, let’s break through this wall of cynicism and look up to the skies of optimism. All Stars did look quite fun, especially if you had friends. The problem was, I have no friends. Jokes! You’re all my friends’ right? Right? RIGHT?

Sorry, slightly side tracked there. Playstation All Stars had potential. I liked the idea that each character had their own unique special moves that incorporated ideas from their series’ and I loved the pretty expansive rooster from Big Daddy to Jak and Daxter. I was also excited that Sony had decided to use their own ideas with the levels of supers and dynamic stages instead of just carbon copying Nintendo’s original characters-brawler.

Luckily, I got a chance to play All Stars at Eurogamer 2012 at Earls Court earlier this year and I had a great time! Gameplay was fast and manic but smooth and slick whilst each character held some of their own unique characteristics.  I was happy and I came out of Eurogamer with a grin over my face. It wouldn’t stay on there for long.

Where has Playstation All Stars been? Since Eurogamer and now I haven’t seen a single advert in any medium for the game. It’s a shame. Sony seems to have neglected a game with some potential for fun and sales, especially with the fantastic cross play options with the Vita. This lack of attention has once again forced All Stars into the dark emotionally scarred recesses of my mind and as a result, Playstation All Stars Battle Royale leaves me cold.

In a year where we’ve had the brilliance of Dishonored, the stunning comeback of Hitman and even the intriguing partial-revival of the Call of Duty series, All Stars has been relegated to just ‘another mediocre release’. It’s a shame but I can’t help feel that it’s true. All Stars doesn’t really show me any originality or longevity and as a result, I care little for Sony’s celebration of their yesteryear.

Playstation All Stars doesn’t seem to have been the success we all hoped for. My favourite mascots have been let down. Sony have let me down.

Rarely does my excitement drop so quickly as it has done for All Stars but I don’t know, maybe I was expecting too much.  It’s a shame the potential has been wasted and Sony haven’t given the reach it should have had. It’s a shame Sackboy, Raiden, Big Daddy and Drakey have been betrayed. But, onwards and upwards, I’ll just have to add Playstation All Stars Battle-Royale to the steaming cest pit of disappointment in my brain. Stupid brain.

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